you should NOT let "everything" to make you happy.

some thoughts on the happiness-making role of rewards.

this may seem like a bit of an odd title, especially in the hedonistic culture we're unfortunately living in. but with this concept, i want to explain something important about “being wise”.

when you do stuff, you will receive a lot of different rewards based on their types. for example, you will probably make money, gain attention, receive honors, etc. these rewards are good! and we naturally love them. but being "happy" with them will affect our minds in several ways. one of these ways is that it changes our mind's priorities to reshape future paths into simpler ones to attain them more easily. this may not be that good, and to protect ourselves from reaching the point where we're followers of the by-products of success, we have to choose (and control) wisely between the things that can make us happy and let only “a few of them” to play this role.

this is somehow the most important part after doing any great stuff. if you let “fame” be your main incentive, you will (probably) become famous, but you may lose other things. if you let “money” be your main incentive, you will (probably) become rich, but you may lose other things. if you let “impact” be your main incentive, you will (probably) become impactful, but you may lose other things. this is true about all incentives, and as it goes on:

“show me the incentives, and i will show you the outcome.”

— charlie munger

you have to choose between the things that will make you happy and consider whether their happy-making role is by themselves or just because they're simultaneous with some other rewards. this is crucial! for example, being famous makes us happy. but nobody wants to be “famous and poor”. this is simple, and for this case, fame is only good when it's a by-product of something more meaningful. it's totally true about money and other conventional incentives.

to be honest, personally, fame was an incentive some years ago. but now, it's an anti-incentive. i somehow hate it. :) it pollutes my mind and prevents me from thinking clearly and independently. i know that i want to think much clearer than i do now, and this makes me remove fame from my incentive priority list. i've thought about many other things that make me happy after doing stuff and reached a list of priorities i think is useful for not being engaged with "should this damn reward make me happy or what?" questions along the way.

i'm thinking this way about rewards, and i will be happy to hear your thoughts on it at sina80mor@gmail.com.